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When it comes to DC Comics, anything is possible. In what is described as an imaginary story, Bruce Wayne is hopelessly in love with Lois Lane, but can’t do anything about it because she is Superman’s girlfriend. He even has a room with all the expensive gifts that he wanted to give her but couldn’t. Instead he keeps them in a creepy shrine room that even surprises Robin. It is even full of manikins that look like Lois, dressed in jewelry and expensive clothing. It is already clear that he is obsessed with her, but do Batman and Lois Lane get married at some point? They do, and in a story that is better written than I anticipated.
Bruce knows that Lois is going to be at a masquerade party, so he dresses up as Achilles, complete helmet and shield. Lois is there dressed as Joan of Arc. She oddly brought a horse with her to the party. (I guess she takes her masquerade parties super seriously.) When the horse gets spooked and almost attacks Lois, Bruce takes his shield and saves her life. The horse falls into a pool, and Superman shows up with Wonder Woman to save the horse. Lois expects Superman to stay, but he claims that he has to leave on a mission alongside Wonder Woman. Lois gets jealous and asks Superman what he finds appealing about Wonder Woman. The two fly away, leaving Bruce with an opening to ask Lois out on a date. She doesn’t see why not, since he is rich and handsome. She doesn’t know yet that he is Batman.
Bruce takes Lois on a super impressive date, water-skiing (or whatever it’s called) and he is so muscular that he holds her on one shoulder while doing this. Ironically, Lois points out that Bruce is no superhero, but he is a barrel of fun. They draw closer together in the following weeks, going fishing and dancing and such. Eventually they kiss and Bruce proposes marriage. Batman tells Superman about his intentions, and he is pissed off. He pretends that he is not and gives Batman his blessings. Later, Superman is in a special room in his Arctic Fortress. Just like Batman, he has a room with Lois manikins and statues. He proceeds to punch one to pieces out of anger. He is mad because she was his girlfriend for years, and now she is going to marry his best friend. His tone changes into sorrow as the statue is among his most precious mementos, and he can’t deny that he loves her.
Finally the day comes where Batman and Lois Lane get married. It is the happiest day for Bruce and the saddest day for Superman. In fact, Superman is Bruce’s best man and has to stand next to him during the wedding. Afterward, Bruce and Lois are prepared to leave for their honeymoon but first he shows her the Batcave. While inside Bruce dresses like Batman, then takes off his mask and cowl to show her his true identity. She loves it, hugging him as they spin around. He says that after the honeymoon, he will explain the secrets of the Batcave with her. In the shadows, Robin is super jealous. He thinks about how there was a time when he came first, and Batman would share his secrets with him only. He figures that he will be the low man on the totem pole, and he should leave the nest and start fighting crime on his own, without Batman.
A year later, Lois Lane gives birth to their son, Bruce Wayne Jr. A few years go by and Batman wants to train him a Batman Jr so he will take his place someday. Again Robin is jealous that he will not be his heir. Robin proceeds to train him in all the skills that are needed, such as throwing Batarangs. Things take a turn for the worst when some criminals trick Batman’s friends, including Lois, into having their brainwaves recorded, and since Lois showed a strong reaction to hearing news about Batman, they guess that she probably knows his identity. They torture her until she gives a name. She says Clark Kent because it is the first name she could think of without giving away Bruce’s identity. They eventually capture the criminals with a trap. But the meat and potatoes of this comic is that the two of them tie the knot, and you can read it for yourself (Affiliate Link) in Superman’s Girlfriend Lois Lane issue 89. The artwork in this issue is excellent, and Lois looks especially lovely throughout the issue. Be sure to grab it.
Bruce Wayne Married?
As much as Batman might be the most powerful superhero in the world of DC, when it comes to being a husband, he lacks. However, before all the Batman fans who are going to come for me with pitchforks and torches, give me a chance to defend my point. I have some good points which you may not know about. Also, I’m saying this because I love the character of the masked vigilante.
When we consider Batman’s issues with commitment, one of the most prominent aspects is his connection to Catwoman. The man has been involved in an endless roller-coaster relationship with Catwoman for over seventy years. I mean, Bruce, you must know what you want at this point! How can someone have faith in a person who cannot commit themselves to one woman? Moreover, numerous other women have been linked with him from time to time, including Talia al Ghul, Vicki Vale, and Wonder Woman. I apologize for any confusion this may cause you, but clearly Batman is a Lothario, not the marrying type.
Now, on the issue of Batman’s personal-professional equilibrium. We are all aware that Bruce Wayne is a billionaire womanizer during the day and a detective at night. This individual hardly sleeps, let alone spending some quality time with his wife. Would you ever think of being in a relationship with somebody who is always on duty to save the city from supervillains? Date night would involve her sitting in the Batcave as she watched him clean his gadgets, look tragic, and then brood over something that was probably far beyond her interest level.
Moreover, I must add that Batman is known for being secretive. I understand he has many enemies and should keep his family safe, but honesty is important in relationships. How can one build strong relations if your other half is always hiding? And not to mention that his other personas characterize something extremely negative. Let’s just say not every woman would like to be married to a fellow who disguises as a bat and combats crime.
It is easy to imagine a rich man like Batman giving his wife anything she may wish, as he can afford even expensive things. But not all that glitters is gold – money does not buy happiness, and in the comics and movies, we have observed Bruce Wayne to be emotionally unavailable. Due to his tragic past and commitment to justice, he has become cold and remote. It seems highly improbable that any candlelight dinner or trip to Paris could make up for this.
Now let us discuss Batman’s insatiable drive to always be the hero. Here is a man who consistently jeopardizes his life. What kind of husband is that? It would be illogical for any individual in a committed relationship to behave this way. In his absence, how could they pay the bills or take care of the children if he were fighting crime all day long? Moreover, one must not overlook the detrimental impact this behavior might have on the spouse: the constant anxiety about their partner’s safety would definitely wreak havoc on their emotional well-being.